What is Dissociative Identity Disorder?

 
 Well it’s my life! It’s what I know. Having DID is a huge secret. It was until now…

I’ve been in therapy for over ten years, I was looking for friendships and support outside of the sessions so in that time i created an online support network called, “Castle By The Lake”. Hundreds of people joined. Some had DID. I found that very interesting, Multiple Personalities, how can that be, how can you have others living inside you? That seemed very strange. I asked questions but could not always get any answers. This was a strange thing this DID. People talking about having more than one inside. I would picture cloud like ghosts or entities flying around their head and whirling into a cylcone like spin til they flew down and went inside their body, how else did they get in there?? But it wasn’t like that at all. It had nothing to do with ghosts or spirits. Far from it.
As I got to know a few DID members of my new ‘Castle By The Lake’ network which I had originally set up for inner child work, I knew I had some things in common with them. Why inner child? because I had never felt grown up, my body was aging but I wasn’t, life was terrifying and I struggled to be the adult my body told everyone else I was. Sometimes I felt big but most of the time I was little, it was my inner most secret of all secrets. Making a place for ‘the inner child’ felt safe, I could be ‘me’ amongst these people and it would be my secret forever. The members of the ‘Castle’ with DID would talk about things, things like wanting for and never growing out of needing dolls and toys to feel safe and a huge need to feel safe. I found those things were too similar, too personal, they knew some of my secrets, they knew my hidden life, they knew me, these people had never met me, they lived across the ocean in other countries, the USA, Canada, England and later I found out some were from here in Australia. How could they know what I knew about me, how come we had the same things happening on the inside? I became even more curious and very scared but also in a way, comfortable…

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